Learning to be Mindful through the Cycles: Finding Center is a Practice
Now more than ever, I know many of us are looking for what can help in ever-changing times of grief, chaos and uncertainty.
There is no one way, perfect way, or necessary way to process it all - and you already hold everything you need inside of you.
This is just one way that helps me find my way when I'm feeling a bit lost.
Sometimes my mind has such a tight grasp on the harmful side of our cyclical nature.
And that's why I recognize the necessity of working with the cycles to counteract and balance and work within the existing ones.
These states of anxiety or freeze or obsessive thinking feel harder to break than perhaps someone who's in a normal state and experience.
Regardless of your experience, you might also find it helpful to have a layered approach to your mindfulness practice which is really just a practice of detaching from an uncentered point and coming back to a centered and zoomed out perspective of acceptance and awareness.
And so I begin with writing or speaking to myself however I can in each moment.
Like when I'm in the car driving alone and my mind is stuck on that thing I said to the person at the event that was ridiculous, I will speak out the stages of Cyclical Mindfulness to myself and repeat each stage as much as I need to unravel and detach from an accept what is true what is unnecessary and what is present and what is needed now in the present.
When I'm in a group setting and I don't feel comfortable pulling out my journal I might type on my phone, or if I don't feel like it's the place for that, I will silently in my head practice the same measure.
Or I will pull away and go into the bathroom and use that time to practice the same method on my phone and my notes app.
When I'm at home and too angry at myself or my partner to hear my own voice, I'll rip out my journal or a piece of paper and scribble alleged allegedly my frustrations throughout the stages of single mindfulness until I can so I can release it all.
Somehow, miraculously, this brings me to a state that feels more objective and in right perspective with myself and others.
My mind is at ease in my body starts working and with me as I listen.
This is what I find to be the most helpful first layer for me.
Once I've done this I'm in a more regulated state then I was before where I can actually consider sitting and breathing and working on my somatic experience, or continuing to untangle.
Depending on the intensity complexity and recurring nature of the instance theme or experience, I might need multiple rounds of this or multiple rounds of a more silent and somatic practice after the conscious part.
Then we go to the embodied part where we recognize the impact that these thoughts and experiences have on our bodies, and work untangle them.
You might experience some of this within the verbal or written part the practice, but this is meant to help us go deeper there and really tune into our body is that are never separate from our mind and nervous system. I call this the subterranean layer. Then there's the subconscious layers...
All I know is that no matter what I use this for or no matter how I adapt it to my current situation or needs It brings me back to my true center, the core of who I am and the reality of the present moment.
It might take 2, 5 or 10 rounds of this practice to feel regulated and centered.... And I might become dysregulated minutes later depending on what happens or if I'm still in a dysregulated triggered state.
I might need to practice this multiple times throughout the day or the hour and that's perfectly okay.
I guess my point is that I'm better off with this practice than without, and I'm better at not shaming myself for when or how often I need it, because it's a tool that truly helps me get back to who I'm meant to be.
It's also a tool that's helped me get the help I need and realize when I need to talk to a friend or a loved one or my therapist, or when my dysregulation is so consistent that I need the help of herbs or medication.
It helps me to not have shame or resist reality.
It helps me realize that whatever happens I still have my center.
Cyclicality is all about layers. We exist within larger cycles of the universe and our Earth's seasons, within weather cycles of the Sun and Moon, and our personal inner cycles of sleep, emotions, hormones, mental health and/or menstrual health.
It makes sense that layers of debris build around us, layers of attachments, and more that we need to unravel and process.
This is one practice to help you process.
If you'd like to receive this or learn more, click here to read on about the Cyclical Mindfulness Foundations Course. :)
